An airing of daily grievances

Occasionally, things that happen in this world aggravate me.

I know, it's hard to believe. But in the bliss of all the shopping, and blogging and working and such, things crop up that really poop in my cornflakes. And if I don't sound off about them, I will explode, and it won't be pretty.

So here's a tentative list of what's under my skin today (in no particular order):

That commercial where it's raining shies from the sky in the perfect size. Why can't that really happen?

Road rage. O.K., I'm in the left hand lane doing 80 mph and people are on my bumper. Honestly, where's the fire?

Michael Jackson. A pedophile dies. Hmmm, seems like karma to me.

The fact that NO ONE will admit that the damage that happened in St. Pete during Tuesday night's storm was from a tornado! I was on duty, I was there! Debris was swirling! Hello?

Gas prices. They lied when they said they were going down.

Hav-A Tampa Cigars' demise. A Tampa Bay area landmark becomes the economy's latest victim.

People that breed all of these poor animals and then can't take care of them. Two cases this week alone in our area of animal neglect and abuse.

More empty store fronts, standing like tombstones.

The expression, "At the end of the day, (fill in whatever here)." If I hear it again, I'm running away.

The new Lexus IS-250 C series convertible. I'm aggravated that I can't have one.

There! I feel so much better, now. Thanks for listening! Tomorrow, I'm going to check out the Ellenton Cafe. A little birdie told me they have great coffee and homemade pie. I'll let you all know how it is!

No bailout for small businesses

The bad economy is choking all of us lately, but small businesses are definitely taking the brunt. Just a short drive up any of Tampa Bay's main arteries tells the story: blank storefronts and "For Lease" signs.

In Florida, small business accounts for more than 80 percent of the economic engine. But in the skinnier days of late, the shoppers dedicated to spending their money locally have tightened up their belts. Unemployment rates just rose to 10.6 percent this month in the Tampa Bay region, translating to about 140,o0o folks without a job.

Local small business have seen their customer base shrink, and some have turned to banks for loans and credit extensions. Problem is, the money's just not there anymore.

So where is it? The government gave the big banks $700 billion in bailout cash to free up credit. That's billion with a "B." But the rescue money did just the opposite; instead of freeing up credit for flailing small businesses, banks are using it to buy other banks. Lack of credit has become an agonzing hurdle for local businesses needing relief to survive, much less grow.

But lending institutions are tightening their standards, lower credit lines and hiking up interest rates. The trend lately has been to deny loans to small business unless they can back it with commercial real estate holdings and the borrower is asking no more than 70 percent of the value.

Impossible standards. Where's the bailout for our local businesses? If we drive 80 percent of the state's economic engine, why aren't our voices heard? Since the credit crunch is propelling this recession, then more relief is needed downwind here where we really feel it, unstead of padding the big banks.

These indeed are scary times. We can pitch in by spending locally, buying locally, and keeping our jobs local. Until small businesses get the chance to grow, our economy unfortunally is going to continue dragging.

A local unbutton-the-pants kind of breakfast

Looking for a great place to have breakfast? I just found one in Largo, quite by accident.
I don't normally venture out for breakfast; being a nightcrawler usually sends me to bed at sunrise. Not a lifestyle conducive to grabbing an omelet with friends.

The other morning though I had to go right from night shift to a meeting at 7 a.m., and decided that if I didn't get a good cup of coffee somewhere in between that I was probably going to throttle someone at that meeting.

The Fireplace Restaurant down the way in Largo was open at the wee hour of 6 a.m., and at the urging of my good friend Lisa I decided to try them out. And what started out as coffee ended up turning into biscuits and sausage gravy. You just can't help it once you walk in there and see everyone else digging into huge plates of homemade, fat-laden, gravy-soaked comfort food.

It's the kind of place where the waitress pours you a rich cup of coffee before you even ask or see a menu. The kind of place where the owners and waitstaff are all family, so it's O.K. if your server goes in back and screams at the cook. A place where time stops, and they make everything fresh to order, so if you are in a hurry, don't even stop in.

To hell with the meeting! Lisa and I had priorities, the first being we had to pig out. The portions were way too much, but we kept stuffing ourselves like our plane was going down. Real-egg omelets and pancakes the way my grandmother used to make them! And the skillet potatoes - loaded with onion and garlic and just crispy enough to be addicting.

The Fireplace Restaurant also has a lunch and dinner menu, and the regular that dine there tell me the Greek salads and cheeseburgers are to die for. After the meal we had that morning, I believe them. I can't wait to get back there for that!

This laid-back "jes'folks" place is at 12580 Seminole Blvd in Largo, just south of Ulmerton Road. They're open at the crack of dawn, waiting for you. But a word to the wise: dieters beware! Leave your calorie restrictions at home. This is the kind of meal that you have to unbutton your pants after!

Great local Mexican eats - and a good story, too!

The economic downturn has swallowed quite a few retail and restaurant chains since the slope in 2007.

Don Pablos Mexican eatery was one of the casualties, pulling out of the Tampa Bay area and closing the doors on their five locations. The popular, usually-busy Brandon spot actually shut down two days after Christmas 2007, leaving many workers without jobs.

Former managers Joe Morales, Anthony Mundi and Andrew Purdy were in the same boat it seems - until a unique opportunity presented itself. They pulled themselves up by the boot straps, pooled some funds and bought the place.

And out of the ashes of the defunct Don Pablos rose Tres Amigos Cantina, Mexican kitchen and bar. Their philosophy is quite simple: make good, authentic meals in a relaxed atmosphere, and make it easy on the wallet.

I stopped in there on Sunday to see what all the buzz was about, and the smell of sizzling steak and chicken cooking on the grill pulled me right in. Fajitas are Tres Amigos' speciality, and you just have to order them to see why.

They do them five ways, mesquite grilled chicken or steak, a combination of both, the Amigo house special combo which includes all of the above and bacon-wrapped BBQ shrimp, and a quite unusual veggie variation with squash, spinach, peppers, carrots and corn.

I couldn't hardly wait when that sizzling, dancing platter came out of the kitchen, all of that good stuff flanked by grilled onions and poblano peppers with all the trimmings! It's way too much to eat in one sitting, so be prepared to split it with some good dinner company.

My husband had their other special dish, fish tacos. Home made tortillas with grilled tilapia, fresh veggies and trimmed in a mango-pepper sauce. Oh, baby.

And even though we were stuffed, dessert was not to be passed up - not with this menu! Fried ice cream, sopapillas and more.

I won't even get to the margaritas ... there just aren't enough words.

Tres Amigos Cantina is in Brandon nestled in the middle of the town center at 2025 Brandon Blvd, (813) 689-6476. You can peek at their menu at tresamigosbrandon.net. Come hungry!

Help for potty mouths

It’s no secret that we live in a world prone to excess.

We can’t help it; it’s just in our nature to go overboard. Especially with addictions, which is why rehabs and self-help gurus abound. Take the show Intervention on A&E. This show started out in its freshman days dealing exclusively with substance abuse. People bring this mediator with his entourage of cameras in to confront a family member that has fallen off the wagon.
It’s branched out now to shopaholics, out-of-control gamblers, people with OCD, women addicted to abusive men, and even one lady who couldn’t get enough pastry. Our voyeuristic selves were in their glories. Interventions for all!

But this takes the cake: Interventions for people who curse too much at work. Yep.

There’s actually a faction of folks who have made curbing your cursing a profession. Numerous studies have been done (one out of Harvard!) and books have been written. There’s even a Cuss Control Academy based in Illinois, who will send out an expert to perform an intervention at your workplace to help clean up the foul mouths.

Is this really necessary?

Then I got to thinking, and decided to unofficially keep track of the people who work around me, convinced that none of us needed our palates cleansed with Zest.

Holy %@$! … was I wrong! The worst offender? Yours truly. Might I need –gasp! – an intervention?

But what actually constitutes a curse word, anyway? What’s the difference between a swear, rough language and just plain infelicities of style? Is it when the juicy four-letter words make their first appearance? Or is it limited to the seven dirty words on the famous list of the late, brilliant George Carlin? Maybe it’s broader, like all the stuff you wouldn’t dare utter in church.

We had this debate in my house a couple of years back. My husband and I marveled at the amount of times – after a stressful night on the job – those pesky four-letter words came tumbling out. And thus the Swear Jar was born. The idea was to kick some money into the kitty every time a curse word flew, and force ourselves to watch our language.

In fairness, we included all the words you couldn’t say on regular T.V., figuring we’d get a meal out of it at the most.

The jar went up during tax time. By March we’d funded an entire three-day jaunt to Orlando for four.

I should have known when the Swear Jar theory failed on The Brady Bunch that our clan was doomed. I’m no Florence Henderson.

So why do we curse in the first place? Experts say to be abusive, to be bravado, to emphasize a point and to release strong emotion. They also say that there are underlying reasons, like fear and ignorance and negativity. I say pffttt! to that. Sometimes you’ve just got to let it out.

Of course, you may see me on A&E. You never know.

You can't smell a Kindle

Recently, I went into one of my favorite local places in the world, a little second-hand book nook in Palmetto, geared up for a comforting eight-hour browse on a rainy afternoon.

This little place is hidden behind another shop that sells old tires and refrigerators and small appliances. You almost can't see it behind the graveyard of washing machines and old hot water heaters, and I found it quite by accident a year ago. It's sort of attached there as an afterthought.

I walked in, coffee in hand, ready to crawl around the stacks and sneeze in the dust and find a few hidden masterpieces. I wasn't surprised to see the lady behind the counter curled up and reading herself. Things are slow when it downpours.

What I was surprised to find, though, was that she was reading on a Kindle! Scouring an e-book in the middle of all of these stacks of forgotten treasures. Interesting juxtaposition.

The Kindle is a curious little gadget. It can download (for a fee) and hold about 1,500 books. The new version will even read to you, if you are so inclined. It plays MP3's in the background if you need tunes to read by.

There's even a Kindle app now for the pretentious iPhone. (iPhone, by the by, is going on the list of things I never want to hear again at the end of the year. 'Swine Flu' is also on it.)
I must admit, I just don't get the whole e-book thing. O.K., it's convenient and it's quick and it may even be a bit cheaper than actually paying for the physical book, and it saves trees, I'm certain. I've edited a few for clients.

But what happened to holding a book in your hands? Feeling the paper, smelling the ink? Cracking the spine? Call me kooky, but I love that visceral feel of a new book. And I love the dust and mold from an old book, too. I like to be in my quiet home office, surrounded by the noble look of shelves and shelves of books.

I also wonder what this slide in the industry will mean for our local book places. Do they have business slip off to the Kindle? Or are their still crazies like me who want to spend all day in their stores, drinking coffee and browsing and spending a small fortune on books I don't need but absolutely must have or I'll die?

I have yet to be published. But I am certain I want to see my work in the tangible, be able to walk into one of our local shops and see it displayed. I just don't think having it read on a Kindle would give me the same thrill. I know I'd have a tough time signing it.

My friend that runs the dusty old book nook that has become my second home had this to say, though: "The story's the same, no matter where you read it." Good point.

Welcome back, Java!

Boy, I miss food.

You see, my doctor took it all away when I came down with bad stomach problems last year. Seems my penchant for ridiculously hot Buffalo wings with a French fried chaser has left some holes in my digestive tract. Sigh.

I’m on the world’s worst bland diet, like plain rice, saltines and apple juice. And while he has slowly allowed me to let some things back into my culinary repertoire, all the good stuff is still a no-no. Like anything spicy, fried, fatty, breaded, rich, covered in cream sauce, doused in chocolate, caffeine-laden, or, God forbid, having any alcohol content.

You know, all the things that make life worth living.

The worst thing was no more coffee. I sat bolt upright up on the table for that little announcement. Are you kidding me? No coffee?! I’m a writer, for Pete’s sake, and a third shift paramedic. A nightcrawler by all description. He could have just taken away, oh, I don’t know … oxygen maybe.

I tried to be good. But it’s so very hard.

So I actually got up and danced a jig this week when I got reluctant permission from the doc to enjoy one 8 oz cup of java per day. Look out world. The problem is, I have been deprived from that smooth, silky, wonderful goodness for so long that now all coffee tastes just plain ordinary to me.

The mission begins. I’m on the hunt for Tampa Bay’s best local cup of coffee (NOT Starbucks or D&Ds). I’m talking all the little book nooks, cafes, diners and roach coaches. Even your Aunt Edna’s living room. Bring it on!

So, fellow local shop-a-holics, pepper me with your suggestions! I’m taking a coffee tour of this great area no holds barred and taking no prisoners.

Whether the doc likes it or not.

There's no place like home

Ah, summer. Backyard barbecues, Clearwater Beach traffic, ten-minute afternoon thunderstorms, and the dreaded family vacation.

The kids will be out of school soon and itching for something to do. So upon us once again are the months when families plan a trip to one locale or another, cram three weeks’ worth of activities into seven days, blow their entire savings, and come home needing a vacation from their vacation.

The last one we took brought us clear to Tennessee, with dreams of mountains and lakes and cabins. One look at the brochure, and we loaded everybody up in a van and headed out on the open road. I mean everybody. My in-laws, my huge, angry husband, his brother and sister-in-law, the children and all the dogs. In a van. On the highway.

These things always sound like a better idea than they actually are.

We drove an ungodly amount of hours and spent a couple thousand dollars to sit in a tiny cabin that wasn’t ours (sans air conditioning) in the Land of No Cell Phone Signal. We expected to be imbued with the beauty of nature. Instead, there were fights, mosquitoes, and a rental boat no one knew how to operate. By Day Three, I tried to get in a cab to go to the closest airport to fly home.

And we were broke at week’s end.

In the face of the Great Recession of late, I find it hard to believe families can afford to take off for a little R & R. There has to be another alternative.

What about a vacation at home? A “stay-cation?” Seriously. Follow me on this for a minute. It’s possible to create a getaway experience at home, still do a ton of activities and not break the bank:

1. Get into the mindset by blocking off the dates to go into vacation mode.
2. Have a budget and don’t stray.
3. Put away ALL THINGS ELECTRONIC i.e. PSPs, iPods, laptops, BlackBerries, what have you.
4. Go off the beaten path and find places around Tampa Bay you’ve never had the time to see, like museums, aquariums, art exhibits etc.
5. When planning, go online and look for coupons to print out.
6. Eat out! No cooking allowed. You’re on vacation.
7. And no cleaning, no laundry, no routine things!
8. Buy a couple of souvenirs.

Yeah, it’s not the same as cramming the family into a rental car and blowing two grand at the Orlando attractions, but just think how relaxed and rejuvenated everyone will feel at the end of the week … and not be in debt.

We’ll be the guinea pigs. I’ll let you all know how it goes!

Ikea? No, thank you

By now, everybody must be quite sick of reading blogs about the new Ikea … So here’s another one!

The Swedish furniture conglomerate finally opened its giant doors Wednesday in Tampa, after much anticipation and hype, and greeted people with lots of fanfare. Guys dancing on stilts and employees banging thundersticks and sporting balloon hats and such.

People actually camped out for the opening of this uber giant, some for more than 50 hours. Some folks brought their little kids and made a family affair out of it. And when the doors finally opened at 9 a.m. – to a line wrapped around the two-story, 353,000 square foot building – it was total insanity.

Is it worth it? Some shoppers that waited in line got a free hotdog. One guy won a $90 chair. Lots of people got nothing, but the chance to boast that they were one of the first to walk through the enchanted doors.

So another retail giant has moved into our fiefdom. Local independent businesses, I’m sure, are keeping a worried eye on Ikea. Who wouldn’t, after all of the media coverage? Ikea this and Ikea that. My husband actually said if he heard the word “Ikea” just one more time on the news that he was going to get a shotgun and blow holes through the wall. (I shut the T.V. off at that point.)

Here’s my take: a maze of pre-fab decorated rooms and $4.99 plates of Swedish meatballs aren’t going to hold charm over people for very long. I was over it before it even opened.

It's a helluva drive, for one, no matter where you’re coming from. And, it takes half a day to tour the place. Two-thirds of a mile for one trek around the place, according to the press release. Seriously. Who can shop with that kind of pressure? Too many things. I get tired just thinking about it.

I’ll take my local indie businesses any day over this bloated, overblown cartoon of a store. At least I don’t need a map to navigate their aisles.

Starting an at-home business? Don't quit your day job

I will work for myself. I will have a less stressful life. I will make lots of money...

Starting and running an at-home business is sometimes one of those ideas that sounds better than it actually is. Especially if you go into it with that mindset. The fact is, it is just not that simple. And with the added stress of a failing economy, it can be damned near impossible if you don't have the right tools.

So you want to be your own boss. Set your own hours. Be the owner of something, and put dollars in your own packet instead of helping someone else's stock go up a quarter of a point. But how do you make that transition without losing your shirt, or your mind for that matter?

The first thing is to understand that whatever you do - from making killer cream pies to grooming pooches - will NOT be an overnight success. Studies show the mean time investment to actually start turning a decent profit is 2 to 5 years. So even if you have that bang-up dress design/pizza service/glittering porcelain frog lawn statue that everyone wants, it's still going to take time.

Let me tell you from experience. My copywriting and editing company, 911 editing, has been around now for over 2 years. I do have a modest client base, and one heck of a portfolio (if I do say so myself); still, no one's beating down my door. The amount of time time I spend networking and marketing borders on ridiculous.

But that's what it takes. That and a market niche, meaning you have to know who will need your product or service.

Other questions to answer before taking the plunge: How will you bring it to the market? What will it cost to produce? How will you find your prospects? How many items do you need to sell in a week/month/year to break even? How much will it cost to set up your office? Who's your competition and how can you do it betetr?

And, believe me, even if you're cheap (I resemble that remark), start-up costs can add up. Plan ahead on where you'll be getting things like a desk, basic office supplies, computer, phone line(s), web hosting, business cards/letterhead/ads/brochures, marketing and copywriting help, and necessary software.

My advice is this: Start with a business plan. Have someone do a professional one (they start at about $100). Mine has saved me some heartache and a bit of sanity. Have Plan B, and C and D for that matter. Know how you will manage the bumps in the road ahead of time, and be able to recover from them. Study your market. You can never know too much.

And don't quit your day job .. yet.